David Cameron may have recalled Parliament today to discuss the looting and criminality, but we all know who really think they run the country. Yes, the BBC have recalled Question Time.

As usual the media are exaggerating the disturbances. What the BBC called looting in Liverpool, we all knew as Wednesday but most importantly for Police Force Service quotas we have heard no reports of smoking ban violations or inner-city foxhunting.

On the panel tonight we have an utterly unbelievable lineup of John “thug and adulterer” Prescott, LibDem Brian “my boyfriend didn’t deal in pot” Paddick, an exotically be-hatted Iranian called Camila Batmanghelidjh, also exotically be-hatted but in a different way Rev John Sentamu and Fraser Nelson.

As a frequent critic of the government Fraser Nelson fits the BBC panelist profile of token rightist nutter so why isn’t there a representative of the government? At all? Society has fallen apart after 13 years of socialist education and social policy but you’d at least expect BBC pet wet rag Ken Clarke on their speed dial to make a mess of the case for the defence.

TheEye will be joined by the splendid David Mosque in moderating what promises to be a partisan carve-up unparalleled in the West since the Treaty of Versailles.

TheEye intended to put together Shot Bingo for this event. “Deprived”, “Cuts”, “Fatcha” and so on. Maybe even doubles for Miners Strike. But the targets are too obvious and there’s an ‘elf’n’safety lawyer risk to how much liver damage would be caused. Tequila, my friends, is the way forward. But limit yourself to a bottle. TheEye, to keep a sense of refinement, may open some calvados.

Join us at 10:30pm at your peril.