Do you remember McDoom promising a million new Green jobs? Or was it a billion? One forgets when the bullshit filter engages automatically. Anyway, the reality, as usual, turned out to be about 4 Regional Window-Box Equality Co-ordinators in Lambeth.

The Germans, ever efficient though, have actually got a thriving line in eco-jobs. Solar Panel Redistributon Executives. Or thieves, as they used to be known.

Organised gangs of thieves have become so expert in removing solar panels from rural roofs that the police force in Lower Saxony has formed a special task force to fight it.
In particular a series of thefts were noted along the A31 motorway, where many chicken production facilities have sublet their roof space for solar panels, sharing in the profit created when electricity is sold to the grid.

“The facilities are easy to reach, but at the same time remote enough that the thieves are not disturbed while they work,” Lingen police spokescopper Achim van Remmerden said. Two officers in the Emsland region are working full-time on the thefts, showing that the arrival of the thieves means market forces are still alive and kicking. Supply and demand, eh? Can’t beat it.

Up to 30 solar modules are stolen each night, up from 30 reported stolen in all of last year. “That is as many as one can fit into a small truck,” said van Remmerden.

The thefts are cleverly orchestrated and the panels are always removed with what appears to be expert knowledge, he added. Three men were arrested early in September, accused of stealing around 250 solar panels worth €200,000 from the Ruhr region. They attempted to sell the stolen modules online, so next time you decide to buy solar panels on eBay perhaps avoid ones with German labels.

The solar energy promotion association in Germany has recommended that solar panels be stamped with a unique number, and runs a register of numbers and owners. Our Government would of course love this as it would give them another home improvement to stick on their nasty new register.